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Cards Against Humanity Can Go Suck A Bigger Blacker Dick

CAH

If you’re a human being who interacts with other human beings you’re probably aware of Cards Against Humanity, because lets be honest, people can’t stop talking about the game. That’s for a good reason though; it’s fun. If you’re with the right group of people who aren’t overly sensitive and don’t take themselves too seriously it’s a great way to spend time together. After all, it is proclaimed as a game for “Horrible People.” However, that tagline needs to be updated. It should be read that it’s a game CREATED by horrible people.

Now don’t get the wrong idea. This isn’t a post whining about game content. I’m all for the game content. Create outrageous cards, mix them with some other outrageous cards and there’s plenty of fun to be had. Especially in our current society where everything is ever so politically correct, it’s refreshing to see a game where “Coathanger Abortions” might be used in an incredibly funny way. In fact it almost always is, but then again I’m apparently a “horrible person” for playing it in the first place.

Oh, and just in case some of you need these type of things…

Trigger Warning: Go fuck yourself.

This is my Cards Against Humanity creation that I'm most proud of

Recently on Tumblr, the user “horriblewarning” got ever so mad at one of the Cards Against Humanity cards: Passable Transvestites. He decided to burn the card and post it to his Tumblr with the catchy title, “DEATH TO TRANSPHOBIA.”  It rang up almost 50,000 notes since its publication on June 8th, the Tumblr community rallying behind this self proclaimed “transguy” (his words not mine) and his insistence that having a card called Passable Transvestites is transphobic.

Before I go any further we need to understand what Transvestites are and aren’t because as you should know, words are important. Transvestism is the practice of dressing and acting in a style or manner traditionally associated with another gender. You know what it isn’t? It’s not the same thing as Transgendered. At all. You see transgendered people (like horriblewarning) have the unfortunate problem of not having their gender identity match with their assigned sex. That’s some pretty serious stuff. If you’re born a male and you feel, and self identify as a female, you’re transgendered. If you like dressing up in clothes and act in a way not typically associated with your given gender, then you’re a transvestite. Do you see the difference? For example, being transgendered means: “HOLY SHIT I WAS BORN WITH A VAGINA BUT I FEEL IN EVERY FIBER OF MY BEING THAT I’M A MALE.” On the other hand, being a transvestite means: “While I was born a male, I just like wearing dresses and makeup. Because it makes me happy.” That’s a huge fucking difference.

Now this wouldn’t normally be a big deal. People are wrong on Tumblr all the time. In fact, I’m sure someone will find this article and call me some type of Transphobic, Cisprivlieged douche canoe and that’s fine. Everyone’s opinion is valid and I don’t blame horriblewarning for doing what he wanted/needed to do. I don’t even have a problem with all those people who supported him. If he hates that card and thinks it’s transphobic, that’s great. I disagree, but whatever – that’s life.

cards-against-humanity

The problem is how the assholes from Cards Against Humanity acted in their response to this situation. Max Temkin went on his own Tumblr and responded with the following: “I regret writing this card, it was a mean, cheap joke. We took it out of the game a while ago.” Oh well isn’t that nice? NO IT’S FUCKING NOT GO FUCK YOURSELF. It’s fine for Max to feel bad for hurting someone’s feelings, but the problem is that they MADE a game THAT WAS DESIGNED TO HURT PEOPLE’S FEELINGS.

Cards Against Humanity has a cards that say “Auschwitz,” and “Kids with Ass Cancer.” It has lots of cards that say lots of really difficult things on them and that’s totally fine. It’s also totally fine if you burn those cards, don’t play with those cards or never play a game that has the possibility of having shit like this happen. The problem is when the creator says something like this:

“We talk about the idea of ‘punching up, not punching down’ all the time. It’s something that we stand behind: making fun of those power structures, because they’re already powerful. Making jokes about rapes, making jokes about trans people, they don’t have the same cultural power.”

So let me get this straight, kids with cancer and people who died in Aushwitz are already powerful, but trans people (remember: that doesn’t mean tranvestites) and rape victims are not? They have already gone ahead and taken Passable Tranvestites and Date Rape out of the game and therein lies the problem. If you want to say those cards “aren’t funny” and take them out, that’s your literal business. However, if you say you did that because you think, “It’s embarrassing to me that there was a time in my life that that was funny” you can go fuck yourself. To the moon and back. Again, I’m all for you having your card game. I’m all for you making cards with provocative subjects but to say that you took them out because you can’t believe you used to find it funny while you still have coathanger abortions, Aushwitz, and the rest in your game? You’re a douche bag.

If you want to wax poetic about how you’ve grown as a person and you can’t believe you made tasteless jokes in the past, maybe you need to not sell your game anymore. If you pick and choose which cards are now, in hindsight, inappropriate, you just look like a gigantic hypocrite. The choice is simple, you can stop making the entire game, or you can keep the entire game as is. You made your bed “for horrible people,” now go fucking lie in it.

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Jared Brazil

Jared Brazil

"Metal" Jared is a free speech advocate, father, gamer, husband, friend and all around cool guy who enjoys a good argument and liberal use of profanity. Someday when he gets angry enough he swears he's going to "Hulk Out" and then shit's going to get real. You can follow him on Twitter @metaljared
  • NeedlerFanPudge

    Yup. Max has been hanging with way too many oversensitive types in California, and every time he’s on Giant Bomb content you can tell he’s super impressionable. It’s a damn shame to see happen.

  • deltax97

    oh god, calm ur tits, the company is just trying to diffuse a bad situation.

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  • Senor Chang

    HA! GAY!

  • Senor Chang

    HA! GAY!